Page 146 - 《社会》2026年第1期

“情”与“礼”之间：从“父子离心”到“父子一体”

the Confucian dialectic of qing and li， the article introduces the phenomenological
notion of the halo of time， and shows that the repair of father鄄son relations is not a
zero鄄sum game of unilateral concession. Rather， reconciliation emerges through
shared memories and overlapping temporal experiences， in which the intertwining of
retention， primal impression， and protention reactivates an original sense of kinship
（qinqin zhi qing）， thereby driving context鄄specific adjustments in ritual practice.
However， even when fathers temporarily suspend their fixation on li and sons，
through affective recognition， reconstruct their practice of filial piety， the deeper
structural tension does not disappear. This is because male offspring are more tightly
embedded in the pressure chain of family responsibility and thus confronted with a
structural double bind in which paternal love always entails expectation， while the
pursuit of freedom almost inevitably implies betraying that love. In sum， the article
constructs an integrated analytical framework of qing 鄄li 鄄time， arguing that under
conditions of loosening authority and family transformation， an affect鄄centered
ethical logic still plays a crucial stabilizing and mediating role amid conflict. This
study not only clarifies the dynamics of change in Chinese father鄄son relations but
also provides a broadly applicable framework for understanding the emotional
dynamics of kinship in cross鄄cultural contexts.
Keywords：Ang Lee，father鄄son relationship，li and qing，intergenerational interaction，
Father Trilogy

一、 问题的提出：父子关系的变与常

当代中国社会的父子关系似乎陷入了一种进退维谷的尴尬境地。
一方面，传统儒家伦理留下的“父为子纲”“孝为根本”的观念仍以礼仪
规范和代际责任的形式发挥着惯性作用；另一方面，日益深入的个体化
进程又不断强化着子代对自由与自我实现的渴望。 由此形成的不再是
简单的代际隔阂，而是一种“情”与“礼”的深层博弈：父亲往往以“为你
好”的名义维护既有权威，儿女则在服从与抗拒之间反复摇摆，致使亲
密关系在爱意与愧疚、期待与压抑的交织中失去平衡。 在这一背景下，
我们究竟该如何理解当代父子关系的变迁？ 这正是本文旨在探讨的核
心问题。
—《推手》（1991）、《喜宴》（1993）、
纵观李安导演的“父亲三部曲”——
《饮食男女》（1994），都是在聚焦家庭语境下的父子冲突与和解：从远渡

· 139·